Sold your soul yet?

At the end of the day, I hate everything. I don't like eating at all. Today I felt, I eat for free and I don't even think about the eatables , who brings them, who cooks them and why?. I'm being mean to myself now, it is totally mean. I'm passing through the worst time these days, it is hard to breathe, weird to plan anything, can't and don't feel like to open books. Honestly speaking Ive never felt this alone, I hate my playlists, hate my phone , anything , everything. I don't want to write, seriously. I will edit the previous entry.


Good night.

Time 1:53, I'm sad, I'm broken , I'm feeling stupid. Scrobbled Trains and Blackest eyes is going on, well In Absentia is something you can't resist. She is shivering, sad , even cried. I think I'm getting better and improving day by day but the problem is , Ive to fall every time to learn something new. That is stupid and Im kind of tired. 15th she had half bottle of Glucose injected , 4 injections including two biggy and one tiny and believe it or not she didn't shout, I was there holding her left hand tightly ;) it was funny when she asked Nurse if it was permissible to shout in the emergency ward haha. Well, we were running out of cash so I got a chance to drive like the heroes in the movie and rushed to Central Bank ATM, since Indian Bank ATM outside our DPT is useless, I've never seen it because of the huge crowd as if they provide a laddu with a 10 ka 5star. Yes, blood test hua, X-ray bhi and it was all about dry cough, chest muscle strain and anemic, doctor prescribed 2 tablets, one capsule and a bottle syrup. We already submitted our Shimla trip fee and Sir, noticed her bandage on the right hand where glucose was injected, trip got canceled , madam got pissed and gussa nikala, gussa kiya. Meri galti hi nikli. She yelled at a pig on her phone "bachogi nahi tum" . Today she has a train at 130pm and Im sad, Ive no idea what Im. I want to go with her but with what face, I don't know. I cant go like this. I will go by myself, Im still sad, I dont want to write but nobody is talking to me even she isnt. Nobody talks to me anyway. Today it was wonderful, beautiful and everyful to eat the last plate of chole bhature feels like blessed man. A third one always walks with us. My kidney thing is again up, they hurt at times, I better go otherwise. Asif's friends didnt miss anything to piss me off, well it happens, Ill be careful next time.

Neend nahi aa rahi hai, mann nahi lag raha hai, bhook to lagti hi nahi hai aajkal, guitar mai mann nahi hai, padhne se koi wassta hi nahi hai, mood kharab kharab rehta hai.